Much to do

So at the end of this summer i will be turning 21. A scary thought i know but there isnt much i can do to avoid this event !! But i can avoid the country and thus avoiding any sort of party or gift giving people have planned.

The enormity of the event has really been playing on my mind recently. Not in the aging way but in the "ive so much to do before im 30 way". By 30 i want the dream job, the dream car, the dream nose and to have just purchased the dream plot of land on to which i will build the dream house. Enough money to travel the world on exotic holidays. In a discuission with a friend recently i told them this and they said what about marriage? Marriage i said ? To be honest it wasnt in my plan, not because i didnt want it to be but rather i had totally not even considered there would be an opportunity for me to get married. If i have the dream house, car and job i would be happy right? I want to do it on my own, and i have always been like this. Its a stubborn trait of mine but what if i do it all and stick to my plan and find im wandering around my dream house cleaning and realise im lonely. I dont want to be a male version of a cat lady!!

So now the question is do i alter my plans of what my priorities are before im 30, or do i just leave the marriage priority to be between 30 and 40. Failing to plan is planning to fail! But are life plans completely pointless.

I mean look what has happened to me in the last 6months never mind 10 years. I got a degree, won a modelling contest, did a front cover of a magazine, had my half naked body plastered acrossed notice boards and projected onto the side of buildings, done an ecolgical survey of a valley in gran caneria, had a nasty hate facebook page set up againts me, moved to San Francisco only to come home again, worked my ass off, auditioned for a meteor t.v advert, realised men are bastards. But bastards are good. And found out who my genuine friends are.

Maybe life goals are slighty more realistic. Rules are made to be broken and it my perogative to change my mind. But once i get going there is no stopping me. Bring it on 21

xoxo
Are You For Serious

Hot Mess

I know you fancy yourself as a sexy bitch
It's in the way that you walk
Do you kiss your mother with those expensive lips?
You sure got expensive talk
Well your lavish life might appear delicious
But not particula-larly nutritious

Cause you need it
Don't you baby
No you're nothing without their gazes
They don't love you
They are strangers
Look how far you have come
You're amazing, you're amazing

Well you worked so hard just to shed the shackles of anonymity
Now every one knows ya and they're all talking
But not favourably
If you wipe the Bolivian from the mirror
You just might see things a little clearer

And you wonder why the people can't stop looking
It's exactly what you want us to do
Everybody's at you for their one hot minute
We've all got to pick a bigger piece of you

Baby... You're a hot mess

Sam Sparro LOVE

Are You For Serious
xoxo

Is there anybody out there ?

Sometimes i get thinking as to why im here in this bed on my own. Why does love seem to find everyone around me, but some how always manage to avoid bumping into me. I have seen friends fall in love only to fall out of love and find someone knew a few weeks later. While me, when im not spooning me pillow, im left consoling thier break ups and encouraging their hook ups.

Are these people falling in love or are they simply the type of people who feel the need to be constanly going out with someone. Do they not enjoy their own company or is enjoying your own company simply an excuse used by us singltons. Im not so sure on this latter view, i do enjoy my own company and i wont settle with just anybody to pass the time until the right person comes along.

Is it unreasonable of me to want someone to take me on a tour of rome on a vespa, lay on some grass with me while looking at the stars, kiss me while fireworks are going off, argue with me, laugh with me, cry with me, have a food fight with me and most important love me.

And i mean love ME, not love the fact that they are no longer single. Is it because im not really into the singleton scene, maybe i have my head in the sand or maybe ill always be undesired and single, good job i like dogs they may be my future living companions.

If destiny is true and there is someone out there, come find me it cant be too hard, there aint many me's in the world. Im tired of waiting

xoxo
Are You For Serious